Remix th soul

Months worth of practice, sweat, injury, tears, bruises, and nights conversing over DC food and Picnic Day and DDR have come and passed. What a journey it’s been. This post is late, but I’d rather have it late than not at all. Anyways, let’s continue. 

SC and I had a little recollection of happenings since last year. 
Oh, I hope we make auditions. Mafia would be awesome. -We make Mafia-
Choreo is hard, but we have so much time to practice; we’ll get it by then! -DDR is in a month-
Gosh, I can’t believe DDR is so close! Nervous! -DDR is tomorrow-
Ohmygoshohmygoshohmygosh -We’re backstage and up next-

The stage wasn’t ready for us; the crowd wasn’t ready for us. That’s all I can say. 

I’ve been dealing with some back pain since the beginning of this year, but it wasn’t until I injured my wrist that I started feeling down on myself for not being able to perform at my best. I didn’t want to let the group down because of my weakness, so I resolved that I’d give it my 100% for the show. So did everyone else. Popping club performed admirably and I can’t help but be proud of everyone 

Apparently some talk had been going around about Popping Club. Although I’m in no administrative or leadership position, I feel disappointment, frustration, wronging, and protective of Popping club with the outcome of DDR and the ramifications of that night’s happenings. We’ll be the bigger people. We’ll come out stronger and harder next year and no one will know what hit them. They just couldn’t handle us this year. Hopefully I’ll be around to see us get 2013, for sure.

Had a BBQ picnic with VO, FN, EK, KC, and AT one weekend despite the unpromising weather. Too much lighter fluid and faulty charcoal was wasted this day. -sigh- A large, chubby, albeit friendly stranger dog approached us and assertively chomped at our sausages, ending the picnic. Misplaced my phone so no one could contact me and of course my parents thought I died or something or other.

I forget when it was that I had to pull an all nighter to write my term paper for NPB, so I’ll just quickly mention that here and leave it at that. I got 100% on that paper too; one of my proudest and finest moments of academic procrastination and pull-good-crap-out-my-ass-ery. The combination of hot Calm decaf tea and cold NOS is a winner, for sure. 

Made and ate a lot of Vietnamese food. Goi cuon, thit kho, bun bo Hue, pho, and the like. 

A week or two prior to finals, I went home to attend my grandmother’s funeral. I hate funerals. I hate dying people; it makes me think of how weak people are. I hate crying people; it makes me think of how weak I am. The combination of the two … ugh. I didn’t cry as hard as at my granpa’s funeral about ten years ago. I stuck with my cousins and we tried to make the best of it. They’re finally together again. I can’t imagine having to live ten years without my significant other, knowing that I can’t see them until I’ve passed. At least my grandparents have found that peace now. My family conflict has resolved itself a little, almost thanks to my grandmother’s passing. 

All I did during break was eat. Well, judging off of my Instagram photos anyways; they’re my only record of what I’ve been up to. La Vic’s always reminds me of Fridays after high school, wandering around downtown, drinking Quickly’s and chilling. Tried Honeyberry with EK for the first time. I love waffles (a la ice cream dessert waffle) and I tried the magnificent coffee scented, ever so fluffy and delicious roti bun. I could eat those for days. Actually, I did eat those for days. Hrm. Ate out with BT and EN another day at Choi’s Kitchen, conveniently located across the street from Honeyberry and where EK went to eat with his dad around the same time. 

The last portion of break consisted of a short trip to San Francisco. Chilled at sister’s apartment until EK came by and we went to Akiba for fruit box. I want to make one of my own! So delicious. The morning after, EK and I went to Cafe Bunn Mi which sells banh mi and bun (noodle soups). Expensive for a sandwich, but delicious nonetheless. Went exploring around the Asian neighborhood buying trinkets and banh bao (steamed buns). Then drove to Haight street where all the smoke shops, clothes shops, and random other shops are. It was a nice little adventure; nothing crazy but a nice chill day. Drove back to Davis in the evening to conclude the trip and ready for next quarter. 

Long long long overdue. Umm, a better, cumulative review of events since last quarter will follow. 

——-

An extremely eventful day that warrants its own post. Things I’d been waiting for all week, and things I didn’t expect or want. The weather was beautiful though.

Woke up at 530, studied until 730, took a nap until 8, got ready for test and took my bis midterm; not so bad! Jetted home after to go with EK to Sac for Momo’s Meat Market. The dude working there was super chill, and knew an awful lot about meat. Shared the 4-way with tri tip, ribs, hot links, and the juiciest chicken thighs I’ve had in my life. Next time, I’d like a hot BBQ chicken sandwich, yummm.

Went to visit granma in Citrus Heights after. Mom and aunt were there, but left shortly. KN and MN came and we talked about  childhood with granma and grampa, their old house in their old neighborhood with the train in the backyard, celebrating Tet and accidentally burning a lantern in their kitchen, eating granpa’s wafers, sitting in granma’s remote sofa/recliner/chair, watching Rugrats in their living room. I was worried granma wouldn’t make it before I could visit her, and I was afraid she’d leave before I could. I was relieved but restless I made this visit. Granma slept the whole time and looked so peaceful, but so sad at the same time. I couldn’t look at her or stay for too long. I was never good with ill or elderly people. Why do I want to be a doctor again? 

Left for Arden Fair mall to get stuff for dormal. I don’t think I’ve ever done so much walking back and forth between the same stores for a single outfit before, and not even an outfit for myself to boot! Shirt, then lucky red bowtie, belt, and pants after a bit of convincing by that swagaliciously suited up sir in the watch section. All I needed was a pair of red earrings to match, ahah. That and red nail polish, later bought at Target. Got into an extremely minor car accident/bumper tap on the way home, but thank goodness it was nothing serious. Got home, readied, took pictures, then off to dormal! My first and perhaps last of my college lifetime. At least I got to say I went once.

Reminded me of prom a little bit, except the dance floor was much larger and there was much more food. The pro about arriving early to these things is that there is still plenty of food and drinks to choose from/consume, and the floors are not yet sticky in the case that you wore heels and had to take them off for decreased foot pain and enhanced danceability. Same nasty dancing at the center, same awkward dancing at the periphery. There was a reliable cipher with Popping Club the entire time of course; poppers will be poppers. 

Some short time into dormal, I got the unexpected phone call. I don’t know if the news hit me at all. I didn’t want to talk about it then either. I tried to shake it off the rest of the night. I’m never good or coherent with the emotional stuff, anyways. I’ll miss you granma; say hi to granpa for me? 

The rest of dormal was quite fun and I enjoyed it thoroughly; the rest ‘twas a good night. 

Fri//0392012

Is it so bad? 

What is wrong with people changing?

So what if I don’t fit the little worn out stencil you had of me? 

I do not care for people content in their safe and comfortable bubbles just as much as people averse to change in others.

Sat//03032012
Ate at Namaste Nepal with FN, EK, and EK’s dad for lunch. Mmm, I could eat butter chicken naanstop … :B Went to Forever21 to walk off food coma and to browse. Super excited and got a few ideas about costumes for DDR, but nothing solidified. Should brainstorm that up some time. Watched “Puss in Boots” before bed! I want a cuddly kitty. 

Sun//03042012
After breakfast, did work most if not all of the morning. 
Some time during the late afternoon, went for a walk in the park to refresh myself. I like parks; they remind me of picnics and a carefree childhood and playgrounds and barbecue and birthdays and gatherings that don’t happen anymore. 
EK made spicy pork for dinner; omnomnom. Tried to start studying again, but was pleasantly surprised by a sweet invitation to dormal. :3 Keke, I say I was joking, but really, my robot cow heart is slowly learning to feel emotion. Lol. :D

Mon//03052012
Started running again today, ugh, I was so dehydrated. Next time, must have eggs for breakfast. Ek came and ran too, and after we got le Jamba Juice and I went grocery shopping. Bought a whole bunch of stuff on sale, which should last me until finals. 
Blocking for DDR, then OTH. Got taro/Rice Krispy milk tea at Quickly instead though, mmm. 

Tues//03062012 
Woke up at 530 to squeeze in some work. 
EK and I went brisk walking/jogging down to the football stadium. I’ve never been to the stadium, let alone watch a game. Yeah, I haven’t lived the college life yadayada. 
Got a call from mom; gramma isn’t doing very well. A few days, a week maybe. Going to visit on Friday, so I hope she’s still alive and conscious for me to say bye if I need to. 
Stayed home to study instead of session, but AT was nice enough to bring green tea mochi ice cream and baked onion ring chips by to chill for a study break. Chatted and recommenced studying after I refilled myself with carbs, mmm. Going to sleep now to wake early. 

Wed//03072012 
Bis, running, psych. Nothing notable I cam remember. 
Bis review session, then AT picked me up for DDR prac at the Ramble. I felt kind of warm/tired, but wasn’t sick thankfully. A BBQ pool party would be super nice here, though. 

Thurs//03082012
Scene partner came today, and I had some ideas to raise the stakes for our scene in drama. Still got some kinks to work out though. NPB same old. Wasn’t in good condition to go to internship so I stayed home and studied for Bis instead. No session. 

Sat//02252012
Did a teensy bit of work in the morning, then had lunch with EK at Pho Kim Long, some of the cheapest and delicious-est Vietnamese food around. Had che after. Coconut milk =/= coconut water. Went to mass and Omogari with mom in the evening. 

Sun//02262012
Woke up early to go to mass again with dad, then to SR to have brunch with my homeboys AL and EN. EK came to pick me up to go back to school, but first we went to La Vic’s for some of dat sawce. Then Fenton’s in Vacaville. Dear goodness, ice cream was never so beautiful or delicious before. Next time, I want that massive Banana Special with toasted almond, unff. 

Mon//02272012
Same old same old classes. At session, reviewed some pieces and learned Mafia’s piece; I feel so ungroovy. Gotta practice! Later, all nighter with NOS and dark chocolate and Korean snacks while writing my final rough draft of my term paper for NPB, eeeehh. This is when I wrote the “Nothing Much” post. 

Tues//02282012
Was more awake/alive than I thought I would be. Acting, then I don’t remember what, just that NPB was cancelled. Spent the rest of the day trying to finish the paper, turned it in at 5, then took a nap. Went to session but wasn’t in the mood to dance. Played a Pokemon drinking game using BJ’s fruity stuff with KC, FN, and EK. 

Wed/02292012
Bis, didn’t run again. Yeah, I need to start going to class/exercising again, sigh. Maybe those beautiful black/blue Frees will motivate me to run…next quarter. Anyways, ate Shah’s food truck for the first time in my life. Yes, it’s been on campus for many a year and I’ve always had the chance to eat it but I haven’t and apparently I have been missing out on life and Shah’s and … yeah. Chicken gyro was delicious and a little messy. Will ask for more veggies next time. Went to psych where we watched an interesting short movie on racism. Afterwards, made Japanese curry for the first time ever. Note to future selves to be careful about the potatoes. Practice in the evening was good, as per usual, yay. Good night. 

Thurs//03012012
Acting usual. NPB slept. Internship was quite nice though. Since Dr. Seuss’ birthday is tomorrow, we spent most of today prepping activities for the kids. TC, JD and I drew and cut out the fish and teal walrus-looking animal from One Fish Two Fish Red Fish Blue Fish, and they looked mighty legit if I do say so myself. Home, ate real quick, went to Segundo. Session didn’t happen, but I wasn’t feeling particularly dancey again. OTH and ice cream from TJ’s and back to OTH I think, and that was all. 

Fri//03022012
Lost in Bis, derm internship was the usual, went home and tidied and did a little work. Then took the J bus to the Silo, met with TD and rode the A downtown and waited for AT to get Noodle City. Ordered hot garlic chicken, dan dan noodles (sweet and sour peanut sauce noodles), noodle salad (with peanut dressing; my favorite dish), and five spice beef noodles soup. We ate family style while talking about everything, anything, and nothing all at once. At least 90% of our sentences referenced shit/poop/turd, and we ate all the noodles just the same. These guys, I swear. Walked around downtown sampling desserts and exploring in Watermelon music and Dimple games/movies/etc. I made a lengthy list of good movies I’ve yet to see, as they were appalled that I haven’t seen almost all of the best movies, apparently. Met at the ARC pre-session, then went to KL’s to use the mirrors for practice. Mirrors are indispensable for choreography practice/cleaning imo; once a week practices there are good.  

At this hour, I am sufficiently awake due to the immense amount of sugar I have consumed, yet am not subject to the fatal carb crash that I was doomed to undergo. Physically I feel sub-content. Emotionally I feel flat. Mentally I feel out of gas. I should be writing a paper, but as a minor writing block and inner procrastinator would have it, I am on tumblr instead. 

I don’t think too much, especially about the past. Maybe that’s why my memory is terrible, and I do not easily get nostalgic. 
I don’t feel too much, especially when it comes to people. Maybe that’s why I have difficulty letting people in and hesitate to let myself seem vulnerable. 

These two things I’d like to change, but life is moving so quickly! I would like so very much for it to slow down. Too too too many things to think/feel, no time. I would like to assess people, relationships, time spent, and future prospects in my life, but I am the worst at time management.